Every Night in Every Home...
That is the focus of the Faith 5--a powerful tool that will help your family draw closer together, closer to God, and bring a sense of peace and joy to the constant ups and downs of life. It is simple and it is profound. It only takes the most precious commodity you have--your time. Invest 5-10 minutes in spending quality time with your family and watch as God blesses your socks off! You can start today--tonight. The steps are simple:
1. Share your high and low of the day.
2. Read a Scripture verse.
3. Talk about how your day connects with God's word
4. Pray together--out loud. "Thanks God for our highs and help us through our lows"
5. Bless one another. Tell your family how God loves them and how you love them
You can start tonight. You will be amazed at what this will do for your family. There are lots of folks doing this--and the stories are amazing. Look for video updates to hear what some of our families are experiencing as they live out the Faith Five.
“What was your high of the day?” “What was your low of the day?”
Imagine real communication happening between parents and kids! A university of Michigan study has shown that mothers spend less than 30 minutes a day in one on one time per child. On weekends, fathers spend less than 17 minutes per child in conversation? Is this enough? Will we allow ourselves to become this statistic? Sharing your highs and lows as a part of your nightly ritual will change your family. You will draw closer together. Genuine and authentic communication will happen.Brothers and sisters will listen to each other. Moms and Dads will grow in their love. Try it! I dare you.
Sharing your highs and lows with a loved one has a very important and healthy psychological effect.Doing this provides a safe place for us to identify, name, and work through our emotions. Individuals will learn that “I am not alone.” Incredible empathy will develop as children and parents learn that when you hurt, I hurt. Sharing highs doubles our highs and sharing our lows reduces that burden as we carry it together.
It is no secret that our world is wired. It is easier than ever before for us to isolate ourselves with our cell phone, our iPod, and our Internet connection. Taking 5-10 minutes every night to share, read, talk, pray and bless will fight this isolation. By creating a family that communicates nightly we are reversing the trends of society. The faith five will create a family that communicates instead of isolates. Imagine communication strengthening as children enter their adolescent years instead of decreasing. Doing this on a nightly basis will show love—instead of just talk about it. It becomes a part of who you are as a family—not just what you do. We are a family who loves one another so we communicate with one another. Sharing highs and lows is an invaluable gift because it helps us all to hear and listen to one another, to learn what is important in each others lives, and it builds self-esteem. Kids learn that parents actually want to know what their greatest joys are—and parents get to do the same.
Not every day is going to have an amazing high and/or hurtful low. That is okay. Making this sharing a part of your nightly ritual will provide the safe space for those conversations to take place when there is a devastating low or an astounding high. Doing this every night will become a ritual. The beauty of ritual is that it holds us when we can't hold ourselves.
What would happen if we read and reflected on God’s word everyday? In opening our Bibles and reading these life-giving words we are transformed. Over time this God thing that we talk about a lot in church—sometimes in lofty and intangible terms—becomes real. As we create and become families who live in God’s Word we are strengthened, renewed, enriched, balanced, grounded, and refreshed.
The power of God’s word is not realized if it is just a leather bound book that collects dust on the shelf. The inspired Word of God has power and strength only when we open it. Think about it. A bible that is never opened—never read—has the potential to offer life to its possessor. But, if the pages never see the light of day, how will this life giving book share its hope, truth, and wisdom? The Bible is not some magic book that works through osmosis. It needs to be opened. It must be opened. Will you open your scriptures? Will you do it tonight?
Sending our adolescents into this world without the power of Scripture imprinted upon their hearts is like sending them down a dangerous, dark alley—in the dead of night—alone. No parent in his or her right mind would do that! Can we afford to send them into this world without scripture to steer them?
Read the Bible together as a family. I know that picking a verse to read is a daunting task. The bible is really thick and choosing where to begin is intimidating. So let us help you. Each day (under devotions on the website) and in the Eagle Newsletter, there is a list of daily readings. Please join your church family in reading a verse a day. You can read a new verse every night, or stick with the same one all week long. Starting in February a new Sunday School adventure will begin which will give you the bible verse for the week to use in your nightly faith five. Or talk to one of the pastors if you are interested in developing a Bible Reading plan. Ephesians 6:11, 17 encourages us to fit ourselves with the armor of God. The sword that we carry is God’s word. Will you unsheathe it tonight?
In Advent we hear the name of God—Emmanuel. The literal meaning is “God with us.” As we share our highs and our lows, read a bible verse, and then talk about how they connect we witness Emmanuel. God is incarnational—He comes to us and lives with us. Talking about the verse and our day is a way for all of us to begin to look for God in everyday. God becomes real and these bible verses begin to apply to my life—not just some people who lived 2,000 years ago. Connecting the text of scripture to the context of our lives is a constant reminder that God values us. We see that we are loved by God and by our family. With practice this can become the most significant time. Sometimes there is no connection between the verse that we read and the context of our lives—that may be the norm. It is okay! In fact, that might be the most honest. You have permission to say to your children that you don’t see a connection between the scripture and the day. The important thing is that we don’t stop looking. We don’t stop opening the bible to see what and where God is taking us tonight.God is mysterious—that is one of the best parts about God! So don’t stop, don’t be embarrassed, don’t be afraid if you don’t see a connection. Instead, celebrate the fact that we have a God who is bigger than our understanding. But keep going because in doing this piece of the faith five every night, we are doing theology. We see God at work in our lives.We witness the movement and activity of the Holy Spirit. We gain insights together as children teach parents and as parents teach children.
Prayer is the glue that holds it all together! Prayer—bringing our hearts before the throne of God’s grace—is the catalyst for God’s activity. It is here, as we pray for one another, that God’s presence is evident. As we listen to one another—as we have heard the sharing of our days, our being informed by the scriptures and seeing the connections—we have the privilege and the opportunity to place our hearts before God. And, more importantly, place our siblings’ hearts, our children’s hearts, and our parents’ hearts before the Lord. Prayer makes it all stick!
As a parent, there are few greater joys than hearing my son pray for his sisters. Imagine the joy of hearing this every night. Of creating children who pray for one another and pray for you. This is the fabric of family—not that we live under the same roof—but that we enter into one another’s lives and hold their concerns, their joys, their successes, their failures—their very lives—in the cup of our hands as we present them to our living God.
What can a blessing do?
It was one of those days—one of those moments when I was stressed and overwhelmed. Deanna and I were arguing—nothing serious—but enough of a disagreement that the peace and fond feelings of love I have for her were not on the forefront of my mind. She wasn’t happy with me either. It came time to put our kids to bed, not a stress relieving activity as you can imagine. We sat down with Ethan and began our nightly ritual of the Faith Five. My anger was still percolating. We went through all five parts: highs and lows, bible verse, talking about how they connect, praying, and blessing. It was clear, neither Deanna nor I had our heart in it—we wanted to get back to our arguing. But then something amazing happened. The power of God entered. Ethan looked at both of us, traced a cross on our foreheads and gave our blessing, “Jesus loves you and so do I.” It melts me every time he blesses me.Deanna and I both blessed Ethan—and then we turned to each other.
Have you ever looked into the eyes of the one you are arguing with, traced a cross on their forehead and blessed them? In an instant—as our eyes connected and we blessed one another we were centered again. Our focus and our attention were returned to where they ought to be. In a moment, the stress faded and the argument was over.
Now a blessing isn’t magic. It isn’t going to solve every argument and fix every broken relationship or painful day—but it does focus us. Blessing one another as families is a kiss from God as we turn out the lights. It helps us to recognize that God is in the midst of our everyday lives. It will not take away our pain. It won’t pay the bills. Blessings don’t heal wounds or cure cancer. But blessings do inform those pains. Blessings shape families and people. They shape our attitude and shift our perspective. In a world that is tearing families apart and destroying relationships at every turn—why would we not invoke the Holy Spirit to come and dwell with us? As a parent I want to use every tool I have available to raise my children. I want to use everything I can to be the best husband I can to my beautiful wife. Blessing them every night as we go to bed is the most important tool I could ever use.
And you can do it too! Start tonight. Bless your loved ones--use the telephone if you can't be in the same room. Use our blessing, the one we use at church at every worship, or create your own. Bless one another tonight--and every night this week--and see what happens. See where God works. And then, don't stop!